Real Life...

...vs virtual life. Hmmm

I started this post on the 25th of January with just those words, then I had to go do something and never got the post done. So now I'm back to revisit it. Today is really February 12 :)

I've always been an on line geek, since back in the days of Internet Relay Chat when the only people on there were MIT guys and other computer geek people (and my sister Lisa who lived across the sea and that was the only "cheap" way to talk to her regularly). We're talking like early 1980's. All through the years and over various interweb (I just like that word-it makes me giggle) forms I have made friends and acquaintances , all over the world.

You could debate about whether they are "real" friends or "virtual" friends, but imho, they are all as real as can be. My point is, there isn't a pretend person generated by some wondrous computer on the other end of the conversation you are having--this is a real live human being with real live human being thoughts and dreams and fears and well, the list is endless. Many people actually forget that, this is a real person here, and treat that person as though they are some disposable thing -- not so.

I may not be a part of my friends daily life, sitting in the kitchen having coffee, but I am there nonetheless, participating in a conversation, thinking together, supporting each other, sometimes holding on to a little thread of sanity. Sometimes I'm lucky enough to actually meet those friends, we've had gatherings of various sorts where people come from all over the world to meet. I was "best woman" in a wedding in Australia -- two people met on the internet and later married and I knew them both through our on-line conversations. Another two people who met in person at that wedding after talking on-line for years ended up getting married shortly thereafter.

I met my husband on the internet in a mmorp (massively multi-player on line role playing game). Yes, I'm an on line gamer, I blame my son Zach, its all his fault! My husband and I met playing this game, we spent two years of many hours playing this game and talking and laughing and sometimes being serious until finally he asked me to meet him to go to a wedding as his date. The rest (6 years later) is history.

I don't remember what started me on this little jaunt, it was something I read somewhere about "real vs virtual" and I just don't believe there is such a thing. We are all real, the form we use to communicate is virtual but still, we are real. My friends that I haven't physically met are just as valuable to me as those I have. I still wish for my teleporter though, for any number of reasons a teleporter would just be over the top awesome.

Vacation!

I'll be gone for a couple of weeks. Normally this would not be such a big deal, but my sister Lisa is turning 40 on February 1st and so, this is a big deal! We've been planning this trip for a couple of years now, we had to save many pennies, and we're both very ready. We're going to One & Only Ocean Club in the Bahamas and while she's excited about things like food and 24 hour butlers, I'm excited about the gardens and going sailing. I love sailing, of all things, even scuba diving, sailing is my favorite. She's excited about sailing too, if I don't say that I will get an angry comment I'm sure.

Today is all about getting a haircut, laying out a zillion articles of clothing and figuring out how to pack them all. It wasn't a good day when the angry bee appeared because I also realized most of my nice clothes were also not going to fit. *cry* Dresses do, dresses are good! I did spend an entire day shopping (I was chained to my sister who forced me to shop). I hate shopping. Shopping is not my friend. I am a kamikaze shopper, I go I get what I want, I leave, I'm done. Or I buy it on the interweb ;) I got blisters and she wouldn't feed me until I picked out some clothes. She said this was all "pay back" HRRMM Did I say I hate shopping? Another thing I hate, at least right now, is three way mirrors. We won't go there right now.

I'm not taking a laptop, I don't know if my phone will work (probably not) and even LT Dan says this is all a good thing, I need a vacation. I will miss him - even though we can't be together all the time we talk all the time so that part is going to be very strange. It's less time than some of his field things though so I'll survive.

When I come home I'm going to learn about making my blog "prettier" and see if I can't add some photo things and some other things. Not too many people read this, but some do so I'll try and show more of who I am and what I do. Carry on!

Edit: Wait, I forgot to tell you, I'm taking these books, one I'm already reading Here on Earth, and the other I keep seeing women at airports and at the beach with so I decided on a whim at the bookstore to give Eat, Pray, Love a try. I'll let you know.

Sometimes I wonder who you'd be today...

Always look at the bright side of life.

I love and miss you Zach.

thoughts from an angry bee

WHO messed with my jeans??!! I just put a pair of jeans on, and guess what, they don’t fit. They are too tight, uncomfortable and just generally VERY annoying. So off I go to my dresser and proceed to try on all jeans which are all too tight and uncomfortable and just generally annoying. I am not saying the cuss words I am thinking because you guys like me and talking like an Infantryman probably won’t do any good. Fortunately I kept the jeans that these jeans replaced so now I’m wearing the jeans that were in a stack on the closet floor waiting for me to decide about what to do with them. *mutter grumble mutter* This doesn’t bode well for trying on my swimsuit which I haven’t worn in a while or the other more “dress up” clothes I have to try on because I need to plan clothes for Lisa’s birthday trip….which we leave for on Saturday and omg what if ALL my clothes are this way and someone has messed with them ALL?! It appears that the *you ate all that crap over the holidays gremlin* has arrived and messed up all my clothes. I could cry but I’ll settle for stomping around.

Did I say that I don’t like this adulthood thing? Well I don’t. I don’t like worrying about my Mother. Nobody told me I was going to grow up and end up worrying about my Mom. Is this like pay back for when I made my Mom worry about me all that time? Well, it sucks. She’s had all these damned tests and they still haven’t found the cancer which they say they know is there because the blood tests and the bone breakage say so. So WHERE IS IT. Frustrating. If it’s frustrating for me I can only imagine how she must feel and there isn’t one thing I can really do about it. Plus, while they aren’t FINDING it they aren’t TREATING it which annoys me no end. Meanwhile my Mom is calmly warning me that depending on the outcome she may decide to do nothing because doing something could be worse for her quality of life than doing nothing. Because, she says, it is her choice after all. Yeah. I don’t like it. Not one bit, nope. So…more stomping around.

Are you sick of politics yet? I am. Oh so sick of it. We need a new President so fine, but still, I want to punch a politician, any politician will do. And this is only January. Heaven help me.

Ok I think that’s all the angry bee thoughts. I’ll try to behave better in the next post?

Conversations

"Looks like a tornado came through here"

"I imagine so, you have things all over the place?"

"Except the things I'm trying to keep track of. Those are in good shape. "

"Well once those things go out then the rest can get a little more orderly."

"See, from where I'm sitting right now, I don't have the highest of hopes. If it was under, near by, behind, next to, or in any other way remotely related to a piece of my TA-50 -- it kinda just got.. discarded randomly to "some other place not where my TA-50 is. Tornado."

"We have extra blue bin things, we can fix it."

"I also have this cool collection of upside down canteens going on propped against the arm of the sofa balancing on the edge of the ottoman. I'm going to be kinda sorry to see that go."

"Well, you could take a picture."

"I also might have to turn on the heat. that or add a kevlar chin strap and webbing to the already stunning brass decor of our chandelier for about 36 hours. They don't seem to want to dry."

"Perhaps you should hang the kevlar and webbing on the chandelier AND turn the heat on."

"Well see. there's an issue with the chin strap. I couldn't get it off the kevlar (it went through the dishwasher)"

"Ummm"

"I'm not sure it would be good to hang the whole helmet from the fixture."

"Try the shower curtain rod?"

"I seriously doubt that's as sturdy as the light fixture."

"Why do I have this feeling nothing smells good at home right now?"

Christmas Assimilation

We traveled for the Christmas holiday. The Midwest is cold. I knew this. I moved for a reason. It was really fun to be there and have woobe my shearling coat. It goes to my ankles and when I put the hood up I look like a little tiny monk or something. Travel actually went well. We shipped the presents ahead and they arrived all in one piece. We were delayed three hours in Houston (not bad at all compared to other places) and got to sit and watch the perfect family and the not so perfect family with bronchitis boy. The perfect family had three children, two girls and a boy, all young grade schoolers. The parents traded off, each child was rotating through a parent lap, playing on his or her own, and chatting along with the full attention of the parent--amazing. Suddenly Dad gets up and says "I need ice cream, who is going with me?!" Nice. Of course when they returned with ice cream Lt Dan wanted to steal the little boy's ice cream, saying "well, he's not EATING HIS!" Oh my.

The not so perfect family had a maybe six year old and bronchitis boy who was 16-18 months. Six year old is running all over the airport being obnoxious, more especially to this other six year old who had a toy he wanted to play with. Dad is standing waaay over there by the window doing nothing about anything. Mom is trying to contain screaming bronchitis boy in her lap and control the six year old all the while giving Dad dirty looks. It wasn't pretty. Of course not so perfect family is on our plane. Better yet, Dad and obnoxious child are in the seats in front of us, Mom and bronchitis boy are in the seat behind me. Perfect. The flight was three hours, bronchitis boy screamed, kicked my seat, beat his head on my seat nearly the entire time. Poor thing probably couldn't clear his ears and I imagine it hurt. Lt Dan slept through the whole thing while I practiced my compassion and understanding skills HARD.

I was assimilated. Yep. I am now part of the family I guess. Or at least as much as could be. We really had a very good time at my in-laws, I enjoyed it far more than I expected to. Really it was just a wonderful pleasant trip. I did my best to find my "place" and do what I could do to help with all the dinners and work generated by our visit and the holiday. I hope I did well, this was my first experience with the family since we were married. Lt Dan was awesome and full of surprises. The little things mean so much. Bringing me coffee in the morning so I could wake up in a somewhat normal way for me, coming to find me and give me a hug if I disappeared too long, just lots of little things that were unexpected and very special.

We made the trip to our trusted jewelry store the very next morning after we arrived, first thing when they opened. There is a whole wedding ring saga story but I'll skip that for now, suffice it to say the first one didn't work out, it kept trying to lose bits of itself until we finally asked for our money back. Lt Dan promised me it wasn't an omen! We had designed my wedding ring already on line but I was sure we were not going to be able to get it what with the holidays and such. The salesman brought the rings we had chosen and then we needed to pick the diamond for the engagement ring. Lt Dan was not happy with the size of the diamond we initially chose so while I was in the ladies room he told the salesman his budget and a much bigger diamond appeared. Wow. My rings are just so lovely and I am dazzled by them. Lt Dan strikes again when you least expect it. Gotta love him.

We did get to spend a few days before and a few days after here at home in the Sunny Place. That was the most wonderful thing for both of us I think. This is the first extended period of time we have gotten to spend in the Sunny Place house and it just felt so good. We did our New Year's Day walk on the beach, I took him to the Greek place for gyros and mimosas and we walked around a bay side neighborhood looking at houses and dream shopping. I was amazed he could do that walk and worried so much about his leg while we were doing it but we had a wonderful time. Happy New Year.

We travelled back to The Cave (that would be the apartment we have where Lt Dan is currently stationed) on the 2nd and signed in from leave. Spent the weekend together and now here I am, back at the Sunny Place getting ready to go to the dentist. Weeee. Such is our lives and its all as good as it can be. It is what it is.