Wordless Wednesday

Becoming an Ex and other random thoughts

I confess. Half the reason I'm not here writing anything is because I quit smoking May 12. That may not sound like a big deal, but imagine being an addict for slightly over 30 years and then one day deciding to stop that. Yeah. Not fun. I had to, first of all I promised Zach, second it was the only thing I did that was bad for me, unless you count the occasional funnel cake.

Add to that Mother's Day, my Mom being terminally ill, Memorial Day, my Dad being diagnosed with Alzheimer's, my own diagnoses of osteoporosis, June 1st was Beth's birthday (the first since she died and the damn e-card people kept sending me REMINDERS like I needed them) and, well you get the picture.

But you know, that is all just normal life if you keep it in perspective. It sucks sometimes and is really awesome other times and hopefully over time it all evens out and can be called happy and content. (she says...trying to find her optimist bone)

Yesterday, I woke up and walked the dog her half an hour, came home, did a few chores and turned on The View. I try to turn on The View and watch them do 'hot topics' -- then I turn it off again :D Before hot topics was finished I was sneezing volcanic sneezes over and over, in an hour and a half I went through a box of kleenex! UGH So yeah, I'm sick for the first time in...well, a long time. I can't remember when I last had a cold so I am sure it is simply my turn but really I could have done without the explosion of cold all at once.

My husband comes home, brings me a new box of kleenex, gives me a hug, makes the sign of the cross at me and walks away. I am the new definition of miserable. Some other things happened, I wanted to find a large thing and throw it at him or beat him up, he starts laughing at me, I start sobbing and REALLY want to beat him up, and then everything was fine. At that point he found me some Army drugs that they gave him when he had a cold, brought me some food and I got a little better and didn't beat him up or anything. I think my husband just failed his first ever nursing job (laughing at your wife when she is miserably sick is a BAD idea) and I definitely failed my patient job (my responses were way not rational). I will be better prepared the next time.

Hopefully I am returning to my more normal self. I have to carry my head back to bed (it weighs three tons today) now but there, now there is a more normal update.
P.S. LOOK! I wrote more than one paragraph and I didn't smoke!

Ummmm NO, that is all.

OK June is better

I've been noticeably silent. I know. Sometimes, when you can't say anything nice, or in my case, good or positive. No words is a better option.

About Memorial Day. I really like this post. Primarily for the quote from the tombstone. "Remember Me and Not My Fate" Yeah. That's a much better thing and once I focused on that I started pulling myself up and out of my little yucky melt down.

More help followed from Trying's place, here and here. She's so good, that girl. Anyone lucky enough to be her friend and hang out with her and go visit the cows is very lucky. One more, there is Claire of the Hooah Family. Claire has turned into such a good and positive part of my life. I just need to say thank you, you have no idea how you both helped me regain perspective and find my center. Maybe prayer, maybe insight, maybe sharing, simply caring. No idea, but thank you from the bottom of my heart.

We now return to our regularly (or maybe not so much) scheduled programming. Carry on :)